


Carrying some

by GreenPhoenix



Category: Oz (TV)
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-03
Updated: 2014-10-03
Packaged: 2018-02-19 18:34:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2398622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenPhoenix/pseuds/GreenPhoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beecher accidentally tells Keller he stabbed him. Then they're in lockdown, and tensions mount.  AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Carrying some

He always carries guilt, no matter where he goes; it’s ingrained in his being. It’s the penal system working its magic, Pete’s carefully considered words worming their way into his heart.  
It’s Said’s teachings slowly starting to penetrate his mind, telling him it’s wrong to enact revenge. Andy Schillinger is dead as a result, and he was only a child.  
He stabbed Chris, and that was just one part of his complex tangle of revenge.  
Meztger he did on impulse, high on adrenaline.  
With Chris it was planned, every move calculated in advance.  
It’s slowly started to eat away at him especially after Chris saved him from Vern.  
Something’s got to give eventually.

*

They’re in lockdown over New Years and he’s drunk on some leftover moonshine he managed to hide under the sink.  
He and Chris should be okay by now; they’ve mended their fences.  
But he’s blind stinking drunk.  
He lets the words slip out even as the midnight hour approaches.  
“I stabbed you.”  
Chris looks at him in disbelief.  
“Sorry,” he hicks.  
Chris says nothing, but his eyes blaze.  
Toby reaches for him, but Chris bats his hand away:” Don’t make me touch you now. I might kill you.”  
Toby nods and somehow gets into his bunk. The millennium happens when he’s asleep, locked in with the man he tried to kill.

*  
Keller is left staring at the sleeping, snoring man long into the night.  
He knew Toby did it, but he wasn’t supposed to say it out loud.  
Saying it made it real.  
He really should kill him and end his suffering, and Chris’ own.  
Everything Toby has done has brought him pain, and he can’t get back with the Aryans now. He’s burnt all his bridges.  
But he was never one of them to begin with. Vern taught him nothing he needed to know.  
Killing Toby would be foolish now, they’re locked in and he can’t fake a suicide.  
Well he could, but he won’t.  
He doesn’t want to hurt Toby anymore. That knowledge is a kick to the balls.  
Toby doesn’t want him dead anymore, he wants to atone.  
*  
“I’m sorry,” says Toby the next morning.  
“Yeah I know,” he replies.  
“I wish I could make it undone.”  
“You can’t.”  
“Could you forgive me?”  
“I don’t know.”  
“I do love you.”  
“I know that. Don’t talk to me right now,” says Chris and eats his breakfast.  
He’s got lord knows how long to try and not to kill Toby. It’ll be a challenge.

*  
The second day Toby keeps quiet, and reads one of his books. Something by a Russian author, long and complex and plenty of suffering to go around. He might as well wear a hair shirt.  
Chris says nothing to him, just stares at him from time to time. His eyes seem less full of anger, and he works out till he’s tired enough to just slump on his bunk.  
Toby watches him do sit-ups and fights the urge to touch him.  
*  
The third day Chris looks at him, and decides that enough is enough already.  
He starts a conversation about trivial things, anything not too risky. They’re stuck in here after all.  
Chris has given up on fantasizing about what he’d do without Toby. Maybe he doesn’t like the thought at all. He imagines Toby with someone else and feels mad enough to want to kill the faceless lover.

*  
By lights out he says nothing, but decides to show Toby that he’s forgiven him. He pulls him close and kisses him. Toby gasps and opens up to him instantly.  
Toby’s no longer drunk, the supply dried up long ago.  
He’s clearheaded and aware he’s been forgiven. He ponders what this means while Chris pulls at his clothes with ravenous hands.  
“Please do it,” he says.  
“What?” asks Chris.  
“Take me.”  
Chris smiles for the first time in days and complies.  
They fall together on the lower bunk, all hands and mouths. Chris touches Toby’s cock through his pants and Toby responds by doing the same for him.  
They undress as much as they need to and frantically touch each other, messily fucking and finally christening the bunk in a strong release.  
“I love you,” says Chris finally when they can move again. Toby knows it’s true; it’s always been true. He hopes Chris won’t be so afraid of his feelings anymore. They can find a way to make this hellhole bearable together. They have to.

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this prompt:: A drunken Beecher accidentally tells Keller that he was the one who stabbed him.


End file.
